Eighteen

25 Sun Jan 2015

Posted by Clare Pooley in family, Rural Diary, Uncategorized

Tags

anxiety, daughter, education, eighteenth birthday, family, love, parent

Elinor had her eighteenth birthday on Wednesday. She celebrated by going to college, attending her Psychology class and then going into the city with her friends. They went to McDonald’s and had something to eat. Elinor would have preferred to have gone somewhere else as she doesn’t like McDonald’s’ food but her friends all do, so she went where they wished to go. She bought some fries and offered to get her friends’ food for them but they declined her offer and bought her an enormous badge with ’18’ on it and insisted that she wear it. They gave her their gifts and then they all went to their favourite bookshop and browsed. They also visited a department store and the boys found the toy department and fooled around with the toy swords and guns. I collected her from college at 2.00 pm and we went home. She opened her presents from us and had a few cards from relatives in the post. My mother had baked her a chocolate cake. My brother came to stay for the night as he had a meeting to go to in the area early next morning. We all ate cottage pie for our evening meal as it is Elinor’s favourite. She was so tired she fell asleep during the evening.

This may sound a rather tame way to celebrate an eighteenth birthday but for the past few years her birthday has been spent at home with just her parents and her sister for company. Until she started at college last September, she had had no contact with people of her own age for a long time because of her chronic anxiety. She was a very lonely and depressed young woman.

Her first term at college was a very difficult one; as you know if you have been reading this blog. However, by Christmas she had fought very hard to over-come her fears and had attended every day for six weeks and had caught up with most of her work. This term has been very successful so far. Apart from a couple of days absence because of a bad cold she has been into college every day and has started to attend her Maths classes again. She has taken a test in Psychology and got 85% and completed a paper in Maths and got 79%. Her English is good and continues to improve and she is working very hard at her Art. Her Art teacher is very impressed indeed and believes she has a good chance of doing very well in her exams. She hopes to go on to do a Graphic Art course at the college. She is beginning to get some self-confidence and is enjoying quite a lot of her college work. She likes the feeling she gets when she does well in class. She is also learning how to control her anxiety and is starting to ask for help at college when she feels anxious.

Richard and I are feeling more relaxed about her than we have in years.

It is hard for parents to realise that their own (probably selfish) hopes for their children may not be realistic hopes. We know that Elinor is very intelligent and capable and we dreamt of her taking many exams, doing well and going off to university like her sister, her cousins, her old school friends. If she hadn’t become so anxious she could have done these things. We have had to put up with comments from other parents who accuse us of spoiling our daughter – giving in to her and letting her stay at home. These other parents implied that had Elinor been theirs she wouldn’t have got away with it. She would have been forced to go to school. I have no idea whether their method would have worked. We did try at first to ‘make her’ go to school but when your child is so terrified she vomits at the thought of school, and panics and then starts to shut themselves away from all contact with others, it becomes impossible to continue. We have seen so many therapists and they have all said that the worst we could do is to try to force her to do anything. We were left feeling helpless, impotent and guilty. We were avoided by almost all the people we used to know through the school. We fought and fought to get her the best help and to find some way for her to continue with her education. Once she left school eighteen months ago everything became easier. Elinor started to relax for one thing and then she completed a course of Cognitive Behavioural Therapy. A year ago we were contacted by the Education Department who asked if we would like some help. YES!

The key to being a happy parent is to rejoice in the wonder of being a parent. This child that you have created is a unique and wonderful creature, loved by God. It doesn’t matter whether they pass exams or not, are intelligent or not, are healthy or not – except you would rather they were healthy for their sakes. You love them. A parent has a duty to make sure that their child grows up knowing they are loved for who and what they are and not for what they can do. There are always opportunities these days to take exams, get qualifications, go to college at any time and at any age. We do not have to fit in with everyone else. Of course, a parent must teach their children the difference between right and wrong, respect for others and that life isn’t easy most of the time. But – the important thing is to help your child to grow and blossom and become the person they were intended to be and what they want to be. This isn’t spoiling them, this is the opposite of spoiling.

Plough Sunday

12 Mon Jan 2015

Posted by Clare Pooley in churches, Rural Diary, Uncategorized

≈ 24 Comments

Tags

church service, Evening Prayers, Plough Sunday, Rumburgh

The Crib in Rumburgh Church. As we are still celebrating Epiphany the Crib shows the Three Kings or Wise Men visiting the Holy Family.

I seem to have spent most of the day in church today. I woke this morning to clear skies and when the sun rose everything looked beautiful and sparkling. There was still a strong wind blowing which made it feel much colder outside than it really was.

I had promised my mother that I’d take her to her church this morning, as the services at our church were both in the afternoon. I left home at just after 9.45 am, picked Mum up at 10.10 and got to Eye just after 10.30. There were a couple of places near the church where I could park which is the advantage of arriving a little early. The service went well but is always much longer than our one and by the time we left the skies were beginning to cloud over. I dropped Mum back at her house at about 12.30 and then went home for something to eat.

Richard and I went to the Plough Service at our church this afternoon. We set out in plenty of time for the 3.00 pm start but we discovered the road was blocked by a fallen tree. It wasn’t a large tree and most of it was dead but it was very heavy and Richard and I really struggled to get it to the side of the road. By the time we had got it half way to the side a few other cars had arrived and first a woman in the car behind us and then a man from a car two behind her and then a young man who had driven up from the opposite direction all got out to help clear the road. Richard, the woman and I had managed to get it almost to the side of the road by dragging it one way but the young man said he would be able to get it further off the road by taking it a different way. He was very strong and put the tree over his shoulder and with the other men’s help he got it right off the road.

The cover of the Plough Sunday service sheet

To quote from the service sheet –

‘The Blessing of the Plough is traditionally celebrated on the first Sunday after Epiphany, January 6th. Often the plough was feted and drawn through the streets to be blessed in church. This was thought to ensure food for the coming year. The following day, Plough Monday, was the first day that work in the fields recommenced after Christmas’.

The decorated plough in our church

A local family bring their plough into the church and decorate it with ribbons and rosettes.

A farmer or his representative says:

‘Reverend Sir, we come to ask for God’s blessing on the work of the farmers of our country, of which this plough is a sign and token’.

To which the Minister replies:

‘I welcome you in the name of the Creator God who made this earth and all life upon it’.

The short service that follows includes verses from Psalm 104 which is a lovely song of praise for all creation and is worth a read for the wonderful phrases like ‘…..You cause grass to grow for the cattle,/ and plants for man to cultivate,/ to bring forth food from the earth,/ and wine to gladden the human heart.’

‘…..You bring darkness, it becomes night,/ and all the beasts of the forest come creeping out.’

In the service we acknowledge our forgetfulness and our gratitude for God’s Gifts. The blessing of the plough follows and then ‘God Speed the Plough’ – some verses about ploughing.

‘God Speed the Plough,/ the plough and the ploughman,/ the farm and the farmer,/ God Speed the Plough.

God Speed the Plough,/ the beam and the mouldboard,/ the slade and the sidecap,/ the share and the coulters,/ God Speed the Plough.

God Speed the Plough,/ on hillside and in valley,/ on land which is rich and on land that is poor,/ in countries beyond the seas,/ and in our homeland,/ God Speed the Plough.

God Speed the Plough,/ in fair weather and foul,/ in rain and wind, in frost and sunshine,/God Speed the Plough.

We are then blessed and we sing the harvest hymn ‘ We Plough the Fields and Scatter the Good Seed on the Land’. Even though there were only eight of us in the church we all sang heartily and made a joyful noise. And the service was over.

The Rector, Richard and I tidied up and blew out the candles and then had a pleasant chat together for a while until it was time for the Rector to leave for home. He is still suffering from a bad cold and has to visit hospital very soon to be assessed for heart surgery. He will have some fairly unpleasant procedures to go through and we wish him very well.

Richard and I had put the heater on in the Ringing Chamber (where the bell-ringers ring) and after Richard had done some maintenance in the church and tidied up the candles we sat and read and talked and Richard drank some coffee he had brought with him in a flask and waited for the next service to start at 4.30 pm.

Maurice our Elder arrived to take Evening Prayers and three other people joined us for the service. Maurice always prepares his services so well; it is a pity more people don’t come to hear him.

An Appointment with the Dentist

11 Sun Jan 2015

Posted by Clare Pooley in Rural Diary, Uncategorized

≈ 17 Comments

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Brewery House, dentist, Halesworth, Hooker House, Joseph Dalton Hooker, William Jackson Hooker

Before I begin this post I must apologise for the confusion about my last two posts, both of which I published on Friday. I have started looking back over my photos from last year and because I am not taking many pictures at present I thought I would write posts about last summer and autumn and use old photographs. In looking back over past posts I realised that I had started writing up my summer holiday but hadn’t finished, so I wrote two catch-up posts on Friday. I continued to use the series title I had started using last summer, but this meant the titles were virtually the same so some of you have read one post and some of you have read the other and very few of you have read both, probably thinking that I had posted the same one twice. I am also having trouble posting onto Facebook. Some of my posts get there and some don’t – heaven knows why.

Hooker House – situated right next to a busy roundabout in the middle of Halesworth.

Richard had a dental appointment on 2nd January. His dentist’s surgery is in Halesworth in Hooker House. Many people will think this a strange name for a house until you find out that it was named after two famous men who lived there. Sir William Jackson Hooker moved into the house in about 1809/1810 after his marriage and lived there for eleven years. His second son, Sir Joseph Dalton Hooker was born there but moved with his family to Glasgow when he was four years old.

The rear of Hooker House

William Jackson Hooker was born in Norwich on 6th July 1785 and went to Norwich School. He was encouraged in his interest in botany by James Smith, a Norwich doctor who also founded the Linnaean Society. He inherited in trust the Jackson estate in Kent when he was eleven years old. William studied estate management and then became a partner in Halesworth Brewery. He took a quarter share for £8000 and moved into Brewery House (as Hooker House was then called) so that he could be near to his work. The house had a large garden and a heated greenhouse in which William grew exotic orchids. He also devoted himself to the formation of his herbarium – his collection of dried plants.

The front door

In fact the house then was about twice the size it is now and the gardens stretched down to the river. Probably the town park is all that remains of the magnificent garden. He was appointed Professor of Botany at the University of Glasgow in 1820 where his career really developed. He retained his partnership in Halesworth Brewery but sold the house to Patrick Stead, a maltster from Halesworth whose maltings were the largest in the country.

Sign on the wall of Hooker House. I’m sure you’ll understand why I didn’t call it a ‘plaque’

William was dubbed a Knight of Hanover in 1836 and then in 1841 he was made the first Director of Kew Gardens. He held this post until his death in 1865, enlarging and transforming the grounds into one of the world’s leading botanical gardens. He built the Temperate and Palm Houses.

Sign commemorating Sir Joseph Hooker

Sir Joseph’s education was more specialised than his father’s. Joseph travelled and worked as a surgeon and botanist on a voyage from Antarctica to the Himalayas. He sent home the first Rhododendron and Sarcococca Hookeriana (Sweet Christmas Box) was named after him. He was a great friend of Charles Darwin and encouraged and supported Darwin when he wrote ‘The Origin of Species’. Joseph’s work on the distribution of plants seems to be in support of Darwin’s theories. By the time his father died Sir Joseph Hooker was already Deputy Director of Kew Gardens and so succeeded him as Director.

Staircase inside the house.

When I first moved to Halesworth in 1988 when Alice was three years old and I was newly divorced form my first husband I used this dentist. I was very pleased to find that such eminent men had lived there and the unpleasant duty of going to the dentist was made more palatable by being able to look round the house. There are information displays on the walls in the hall.

Information board on the Hookers

Richard and I met and we found we attended the same dentist. As Alice got older she became unhappy with the dentist at Hooker House as he wasn’t very good at putting children at ease. I took her to a different dentist in the town but continued going to Hooker House myself and started taking Elinor as soon as her teeth came through. We both eventually left the dentist after an ‘incident’. When Elinor was about two years old she started to become very nervous about going to see doctors and dentists. During an examination Elinor became quite distressed and kicked the dentist! He was very good about it considering the discomfort he was in but I just couldn’t go back again!

Richard took these photographs on his phone.

Peak District Holiday 1st to 9th July. Day 6.

09 Fri Jan 2015

Posted by Clare Pooley in Rural Diary, Uncategorized, walking

≈ 18 Comments

Tags

Hen Cloud, rocks, The Roaches, Tittesworth Water, walking

Tittesworth Reservoir

After a very pleasant afternoon spent in Manchester with my mother-in-law, Richard and I returned to our caravan near Leek via the ‘Cat and Fiddle’ pass. This is a road that crosses the Peaks from Macclesfield to Buxton with the Cat and Fiddle pub at the summit at an altitude of 1690 feet. This has often been voted Britain’s most dangerous road as it has drystone walls along it and has many sharp and sometimes blind bends. It is a favourite road with motorcyclists. Richard drove carefully and we enjoyed glorious views across the Cheshire plains and over the moors. No photographs I’m afraid.

We had a quick meal and after a short rain shower passed over us we decided to go out for an evening walk. Our favourite short walk is up Hen Cloud and this is what we decided to do that evening.

The shower disappearing over the hill

The hill is a short drive from our camp-site – we can get there in less than ten minutes.

This is Hen Cloud seen from where we parked our car.

The most strenuous part of the walk is the steep ascent up the side of a field from the road which always leaves us a little breathless.

At the top of the field is a gate on the right leading to the path up Hen Cloud. If we look left we see The Roaches. The word ‘Roaches’ derives from the French word roches – rocks.

This is what The Roaches look like when we have ascended Hen Cloud a little.

A view of Tittesworth Reservoir (or Tittesworth Water as it is now called) from near the top of Hen Cloud

As you can see the path is fairly easy and goes through heather and cotton grass.

Tittesworth Water from the top of Hen Cloud. Why do some people feel it necessary to cut their names and messages into rocks and trees?

Looking through a gap in the rock we see the steep drop to the road below.

Another view of the Roaches. It has only taken us half an hour to get up here and we are old and infirm – well – nearly!

A different view from the top of Hen Cloud

And another!

Tittesworth Water again

These rocks are on the edge of the escarpment

On the other side of the line of trees below us was a camp full of teenage girls. You wouldn’t believe the noise of incessant chatter that floated up to us on the still evening air! Or perhaps you would, if you have anything to do with teenage girls!

A close-up of one of the rocks. This, I believe, is Gritstone which erodes easily. It is a coarse type of Sandstone.

Grasses and flowers living in the cracks in the rocks. A few lichens there too.

Strange rock shapes

And more strange rocks.

We are always a little sad to leave the top of Hen Cloud.

Peak District Holiday 1st to 9th July. Day 5 Part 2 and Day 6.

09 Fri Jan 2015

Posted by Clare Pooley in churches, Rural Diary, Uncategorized

≈ 11 Comments

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All Saints church, Brindley's Mill, James Brindley, Leek Staffordshire, murals, Richard Norman Shaw, stained glass

During our day in Leek (mentioned in a former post), we also re-visited two favourite places.

This post is written with some help from the information booklets I obtained from All Saint’s Church, Leek and Brindley’s Mill, Leek.

ALL SAINTS CHURCH

All Saints Church, Leek is built of dark gritstone and some pink sandstone.

This church was designed by Richard Norman Shaw (1831-1912) and is considered the finest of all the sixteen he worked on. He mainly designed great houses and public buildings – 200 are attributed to him – including ‘Cragside’ in Northumberland and New Scotland Yard in London, the former headquarters of the Metropolitan Police. He followed A W N Pugin’s methods and principles which included honesty in the use of materials and the use of local building stone wherever possible. He also worked for some years as assistant to George Edmund Street and many of Street’s principles can be seen in Shaw’s churches – very low chancel screens without superstructure and the altar visible from all parts of the building.

The High Altar. The beautiful painted Reredos shows Christ’s Crucifixion and the Great East Window behind, designed by the artist Edward Burne-Jones, is a ‘Jesse’ window and shows the ancestry of Christ.

This was the third time we had visited this church and each time we have been there we have been welcomed and shown wonderful hospitality by the parishioners who open their church to visitors twice a week, provide coffee, tea and biscuits and lots of information and chat.

The stained glass windows are sumptuously coloured.

Miriam, Esther and Ruth by J E Platt

Faith, Hope and Charity by E Burne-Jones

St Stephen, St Catherine and St Alban by G Horsley

St Chad of Lichfield, King Alfred of Wessex and St Werburgh of Chester by J E Platt

St Augustine of Hippo, St Jerome, St Ambrose and St Gregory by Morris and Co

King David, King Solomon, Hezekiah and Josiah by Morris and Co

Deborah, Huldar and Judith by Morris and Co

East Window – Ancestry of Christ by E Burne-Jones

The West Window has no stained glass and shows the beautiful tracery to good effect

The pulpit is decorated beautifully with carving and pierced woodwork. It also has a tester or sounding board above it which helped with acoustics before the use of microphones.

Part of the painted ceiling in the chancel.

The highly decorated Lady Chapel. The wall painting shows the Annunciation, the visit of the Angel Gabriel to Mary when she is told she has been chosen to be the Mother of Christ.

Another painting in the Lady Chapel and on the south wall is of St Francis of Assisi preaching to the birds. Unfortunately the photographs I took were not good enough as the light levels were poor.

: Wall painting

: Wall painting

032One of stations of the cross (640x480)

One of the fourteen Stations of the Cross carved in 1991 by a local craftsman, John Owen.

A framed embroidery of an angel – a late example of the work of a member of the Leek School of Embroidery.

The font is made from green marble and the floral design on the west wall behind it is believed to be by William Morris.

This painting had only just been restored and replaced in the church the day we visited.

BRINDLEY’S MILL

Our next port of call was to Brindley’s Mill. As it is on a busy road I was unable to take a photograph of the outside of the mill so I have found a picture of it on-line – thanks to the Peak District On-line site.

I also found a photograph of what it looked like before successive roadworks raised the road level and caused the demolition of part of the building in 1948. This photograph comes from the Staffordshire Past Track site.

James Brindley was born in 1716, the eldest of the seven children of a Derbyshire small farmer. Brindley had very little schooling as he was kept very busy on the farm. The family moved to Leek when he was ten and at the age of seventeen he was apprenticed to a millwright near Macclesfield in Cheshire. He had a wonderful memory and stored up all sorts of useful information that he gleaned on his trips with journeymen to a variety of mills in the area. After two years his grasp of mechanical detail was remarked on by a mill manager and when the millwright to whom he was apprenticed failed to produce machinery for a new paper mill, Brindley, on his own initiative, visited the mill fifty miles away to see what was required. He was subsequently put in charge of the work which was completed satisfactorily. He thereafter looked after the business until the millwright’s death. Brindley set up his own millwright’s business in 1742 at the age of 26. He opened up another workshop in the Potteries where, after working with master potters and colliery owners he became known as ‘The Schemer’. His mill work continued including water mills for corn, flint and textiles, all requiring different internal machinery. Where no water was available he used ‘fire engines’ as early steam pumps were known. He patented improvements to existing machines. He replaced water by wind in Burslem for grinding flint for the Wedgewoods.

Brindley built the cornmill in Leek in 1752 on a site where a mill had stood since Domesday, on the River Churnet.

The River Churnet seen from the mill

In constructing this mill he showed a variety of skills – a millwright’s knowledge of mechanics and hydraulics was accompanied by the ability to create a stylish building using new weight-bearing techniques. He also exhibited civil engineering skills when constructing the weir by compacting clay, as he did later when forming the beds of the canals he made. His canals transformed the way goods were transported across England and he became very famous. Because of his lifestyle – constant travelling, overwork and also the onset of diabetes – he died at the early age of 56.

The working waterwheel

Four photos of the tentering gear (three sets of different vintages are bolted to the ceiling). They adjust the gaps between the millstones on the floor above to control the fineness of the flour.

At the rear of the photo is the pit wheel which is connected to the waterwheel outside by the axle-tree. The main shaft is made of oak and is 18″ in diameter. It is supported by a brass footstep bearing which is bolted to the floor. Around the base of the main shaft is the wallower – a gear which is driven by the pit wheel. At the front of the photo is the wooden pipe which conveys the meal from the millstones above. The meal is then sieved.

This is a photo of the next floor. Grain is poured into the wooden hopper from the floor above. The new hopper here is a quarter scale replacement to make demonstrations easier. Below the hopper is a tray (the shoe). One of the arms attached to the shoe is held against the rotating four-sided shaft by a rope attached by a springy bar of willow. As the shaft turns its four edges create a shuddering movement in the shoe which allows the grain to be jerked out at a regular pace into the eye of the top stone.

Mill stones

If the stone became worn or it ground unevenly it could be repaired by being weighted on one side. This one has been weighted by an old flat iron.

A work bench with tools used in the mill

The Garner floor or top floor where the grain is stored prior to milling. The sacks are conveyed up to this floor with a sack hoist

Brindley’s level and notebook

This is a theodolite level – a spirit level above a telescope above a compass – and was the most advanced piece of technology which he used in planning his canals.

This is one of four of Brindley’s notebooks in existence and are mainly aids to his memory – time taken to ride to distant places, where he found suitable timber, clothes he bought, how much he was owed etc.

The following day, which was Sunday, we attended church at All Saints and had coffee afterwards in their large church room in the undercroft. Such friendly people!

We then travelled to Manchester and spent some time visiting my mother-in-law in her house. Probably the last time I will see the house, though I didn’t realise it then.

A Gentle Day

14 Sun Dec 2014

Posted by Clare Pooley in Rural Diary, Uncategorized, walking

≈ 19 Comments

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Christmas preparations, Christmas Tree, Christmas Wreath, crinkle-crankle wall, Halesworth, Rectory Lane

A beautiful sunrise on Tuesday of this week.

Term has ended and E managed to attend every day for six weeks! We are so pleased with her and she is very proud of herself too. She has found a really nice group of friends and is starting to relax and enjoy life. She is on track with two out of the four subjects she is studying and just needs to do a little extra work to catch-up in Art. The one subject that needs a lot of work is her Maths but I am hoping that R and I can persuade her to get on with that during the Christmas break. She is going into college next Tuesday for an Art catch-up day which will be a great help.

I have got most of my present-buying done but I haven’t started on the card-writing yet. I must clean the house properly as it has only had a lick and a promise lately and then we can put the decorations up. I must also start baking and freezing food in advance to save time later.

R has one more week at work and then has two weeks annual leave. He had a hospital appointment during the week for a bone-density scan in case he has started to get osteoporosis. This is part of the investigation he has to under-go because of the tumour on his pituitary gland. He has two separate hospital appointments next week, one to see if his adrenal gland is working properly and the other at the eye clinic. We are not sure if the eye clinic appointment is to do with his pituitary problem (the gland is very close to the optic nerve) or whether it is a routine check-up. He has keratoconus (conical corneas) and has to wear special contact lenses.

My eldest daughter Alice, will be coming home on Christmas Eve and will stay until New Year’s Eve. My sister is visiting on Monday and I hope to be seeing my brother sometime soon too. Mum seems to be fine at the moment. I took her Christmas shopping in Norwich on Tuesday and then we did her usual grocery shopping on Wednesday. I will take her to church tomorrow. She hasn’t been for weeks, sadly – I haven’t been able to take her as I’ve had other duties and there is no-one else around it seems, who could do it either. This is very unfortunate especially as she takes great comfort from her church attendance. Mum and Dad, when he was alive, give and gave so much of their time and skill to that church that I am surprised that she can be forgotten so easily. Mum got a phone call a couple of weeks ago from a lady at the church asking if Mum could provide a cake for the Christmas Bazaar. Mum said she was happy to but had no means of getting the cake to the church. She was told that that would be no problem. Someone would come and collect it and as there was a funeral of an old friend of my father’s on the same day as the bazaar, Mum would get a lift to that as well. Mum made two cakes and phoned and left a message to say she had made them. She phoned on the day of the bazaar and left another message. No-one came and no-one has been in touch to apologise. She is 84 and has very little money to spare and very little energy to spare either. I am hoping that she will get an apology tomorrow.

I have become very tired because of the extra driving I have had to do lately. I have driven over 11,000 miles since the beginning of September, spending on average 4 hours a day in the car. The days I take Mum out as well as doing the double journey to Norwich and back I spend nearer to 5.5 hours in the car. I have bought a lot of petrol, filling the tank every five days. Fortunately the price of petrol has gone down recently – at the moment it is 118.9 pence per litre here. I am still trying to do my household chores but I have had to give up my gardening. I haven’t even had time to feed the birds for weeks and weeks. Tiredness has made me grumpy, prone to upset stomachs, prone to tears and a ‘Scrooginess’ comes over me when I have to think about Christmas.

Humbug!

Today, however, has been such a pleasant one. We woke to another clear and frosty morning. R and I enjoyed a relaxed breakfast and then I drove us to Bungay so that we could collect the Christmas wreath I had ordered a week or so ago. We haven’t been out together for some while so this walk through the town made a nice change. R bought a newspaper and we returned home.

Our Christmas Wreath

E had a hair appointment to go to in Halesworth at 1.00 pm so this time R drove us. We walked with her to the hairdressers and then went to buy some dried ingredients for R’s soup-making from a delicatessen in the Thoroughfare. In most English towns the main street is known as the High Street but in Suffolk many towns call their main street the ‘thoroughfare’. We called in at a café and had coffee and then, as there was still about a quarter of an hour until E would be finished we walked up Rectory Lane back to the Market Place. This is a narrow alleyway that runs behind the Thoroughfare from the north of the town to the south.

The lane goes alongside the Town River, a tributary of the River Blyth.

A few weeks ago when we had nearly two days of heavy rain, this little river was very close to breaking its banks and flooding the town.

A view down the river from the bridge.

The crinkle-crankle wall. There are twice as many crinkle-crankle walls in Suffolk than in the whole of the rest of the country

A small door in the wall. It is only about 5′ tall.

The end of Rectory Lane just before it emerges into Chediston Street.

R walking up Chediston Street

Halesworth is quite a busy market town but as you can see, even on a Saturday afternoon less than two weeks before Christmas some peace and quiet can be had.

We returned to our car and almost immediately E joined us looking lovely with her neatly cut and straightened hair. We drove to Holton, a village on the outskirts of Halesworth where we usually buy our Christmas tree at a farm. We quickly found a suitable one and took it home with us.

Our well-wrapped Christmas tree.

R will trim a little off the base of the trunk and a couple of the lower branches and then fit it into the tree stand after we have soaked it for a few days. We will bring it into the house in a few days time and then decorate it. This is the first year that Alice hasn’t been here to help us.

Advent

11 Thu Dec 2014

Posted by Clare Pooley in churches, music, Rural Diary, Uncategorized

≈ 12 Comments

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Advent, Advent Candle, Advent Crown, Carols and Capers, Medieval church, music and dance

I took this photo a week ago when, for an hour, the thick pall of cloud that had been over us for a week or more receded towards the coast and we saw the sun. I was amazed to see how deep the cloud was. The cloud returned shortly after I took this picture.

We are now in the second week of Advent and Christmas is looming fast. I like Advent – at least I like Advent in theory, if not in practice. I wish time would go a little slower so that I could fit in all the Christmas preparations and still have opportunity for quiet reflection. i wish to appreciate and enjoy anticipating Christmas.

There used to be a children’s programme on TV when both my girls were younger called ‘Bernard’s Watch’ in which a boy called Bernard had a special watch that could halt time, stopping everyone in their tracks, while Bernard rushed about trying to catch up and put things right. I want Bernard’s watch!

Unfortunately, this time of year is so full of doctor’s and hospital appointments, check-ups at the optician and dentist, visits to relatives, trying to remember last postal dates and ordering of meat and wreaths, that the really nice bits are side-lined and fitted-in to our schedule almost as an after-thought.

Our Advent Crown with the first candle alight

At home we make an Advent Crown with evergreen and candles, we have an Advent Candle and Advent Calendars.

The Advent candle

While E and I make the Crown and also a table-centre decoration as well, it is traditional for us to play an ancient tape that we have had since my eldest daughter was little. It is the most horrible of tapes with what my daughters describe as ‘cheesy’ Christmas songs on it. If R is around he complains very loudly when we put the ‘music’ on but I don’t think Advent Sunday would be half as much fun without it.

004Elinor's Advent arrangement (640x480)

My daughter’s table-centre arrangment

The Sunday before last (30th November) was Advent Sunday so the day before that, R and I went to Rumburgh Church to make sure all was tidy and in order and to put the church Advent Crown together. There are plenty of evergreen trees and plants in the churchyard so I gathered a selection of good looking cuttings and arranged them as best I could around the candle holder.

Rumburgh’s Advent Crown

While I was wandering about the churchyard looking for greenery I saw this…

An extremely early primrose.

…and this.

A coral fungus. This was very small as you can see by comparing it to the pea-shingle next to it.

I also saw this…

Holly with berries. If you look carefully you’ll see the mildew on the shiny leaves. It has been so damp this autumn!

…..and this

The wooden churchyard gate has turned green too

010Gate to path leading to churchyard (640x480)

as has the gate to the path which leads to the churchyard. Our church is not visible from the road.

We have no church services at Rumburgh for the whole of the Advent and Christmas period this year but we do have a couple of carol services, the first of which was last Sunday, 7th December.

We had travelled up to Manchester on Saturday 6th December so that we could visit my in-laws. R had driven up from Gloucestershire in the West Country where he had been working and E and I had gone on the train from home. Because of the new franchise there is no longer a direct train route to Manchester from East Anglia. The quickest and cheapest route was to travel south to London, cross the city from Liverpool Street Station to Euston Station and then take the pendolino train north to Manchester from there. My poor mother-in-law is still very unwell but has left hospital and is now in a respite care-home for a few weeks. Since moving to the care home she has caught a chest infection which has added to the problems she has with breathing because of a faulty valve in her heart. She also fell and broke her thumb so has her hand in a plaster cast. We stayed with her for about half an hour at most and then left when we saw that she was tiring. We then drove to a restaurant and met my brother-in-law and his partner, his son and his partner and their two-year-old daughter and had a meal together. R’s nephew, nephew’s partner and daughter had all had the chesty cough and cold but my brother-in-law was still suffering with it and we have since heard that his partner has become ill with it. This does not bode well for us! We returned to our very basic hotel and had a restless night before driving home on Sunday morning. We set off shortly after 9.00 am and got back home just after 2.00 pm. We had a short rest before going to the church to get it ready for the carol service.

The interior of our church. R is starting to get it ready for the service.

There are many candles to be lit and the mince pies and mulled wine to set out before the congregation start to arrive.

Here is R lighting the candles on one of the window sills. R is 6′ 3.5″ tall and even by standing on the pew and stretching he can only just reach!

We set out the refreshments on the table at the back of the church and covered them for protection

Floral display round the font

This service is called Carols and Capers and is organised by our local folk groups and Morris dancers. (A caper is a skip or jump and is used in Morris dancing). Unfortunately, this year we didn’t have as many people in the church as in past years, probably because of a number of other events going on in the area. I usually make my own mince pies to bring to the service but I had been much too busy and so I brought bought ones.

The congregation began to arrive

The second candle was lit on the Crown

The service went very well with a mixture of communal unaccompanied carol singing, dancing, solo singing, recitation and instrumental music. Three of us from church were asked to do some readings from the Nativity Story and the Rector gave us a Bidding-prayer at the beginning, an amusing talk on ‘Christmas Words’ and sent us home with a Blessing.

Gallimaufry are a dance group who specialise in Medieval and Tudor dances

Gallimaufry

Pearl in the Egg are a couple of very talented young women who play period instruments. Here they are playing the music for Gallimaufry to dance to.

Pearl in the Egg then sang and played to us. This is my favourite part of the evening. According to their web-site, Pearl in the Egg (Perle in the Eghe) was the name of a real minstrel, a blind harpist who performed for King Edward I in 1306. He performed along with the Minstrel with the Bells, Matilda Makejoy and Reginald the Liar.

Pearl in the Egg describe themselves as Historical Musicians and they perform in many places including in churches, at fairs and at schools. They give talks and presentations and not only perform Medieval music but also Tudor, Victorian and 1940’s as well. Pearl in the Egg was a term used to describe cataracts in Medieval England.

‘Rumfolk’ then sang to us

And Rumburgh Morris danced for us

A most enjoyable evening rounded of with the mince pies and mulled wine and lots of talk! Our next carol Service is on Saturday 20th December.

Sunday Walk

11 Tue Nov 2014

Posted by Clare Pooley in churches, domestic animals, plants, Rural Diary, trees, Uncategorized, walking

≈ 15 Comments

Tags

All Saints church, autumn leaf colour, barn owl, bryony berries, field views, guelder rose, hawthorn berries, Lowestoft, muddy lanes, Remembrance Day, spindle berries, St Margaret South Elmham, St Nicholas South Elmham church, stress, stress management, walking

Stressed!

Yesterday evening E and I went to Lowestoft to attend a stress management course. Stress in all it manifestations was described, its causes and what keeps it going. We were told how it affects our thoughts, actions and body and why it affects people in different ways. We have been given a relaxation CD and a little homework to do for next week. This is a rolling course; as soon as this one finishes it starts all over again with a different set of people. There is a day-time course running at the same time as this in Great Yarmouth on a Thursday morning. There are courses like this being run all over the country all the time. The room we were in was full of people of different ages – a few had brought companions like me – but most of us there were sufferers from stress of one type or another. Research done a few years ago states that in this country 4 out of 10 people suffer from stress. This figure is already out of date – anxiety and stress are on the rise.

Lowestoft is affected, like most British seaside towns, by high unemployment especially in the winter. The recent down-turn in the economy has made a bad situation worse. Shops have had to shut and the buildings are still empty or ‘pound shops’ and pawn shops have replaced them. However, it looks better cared-for than Great Yarmouth and a lot has been done recently to brighten it up and improve the road system. As well as being a traditional seaside resort Lowestoft developed firstly as a fishing port, mainly herrings, and when that declined it became, with Great Yarmouth, the base of the oil and gas exploitation industry in the southern North Sea. This has now declined too but Lowestoft has begun to develop as the centre of the renewable energy industry within Eastern England. Parts of the North Town are very attractive and the old Scores are still there – the steep narrow lanes with steps up from the beach that were used by fishermen and smugglers. The Scores are now the site of an annual race which raises money for charity.

Lowestoft is the most easterly point in Great Britain and is on the edge of the Broads which is a series of connected rivers and lakes and Britain’s largest protected wetland and 3rd largest inland waterway. Some of the earliest evidence of settlement in Britain has been found in the town – flint tools dating back 700,000 years. I will try to make a post about Lowestoft at a future date.

As sunset is now about 4 o’clock in the afternoon we drove there and back in the dark. We parked on the sea front and, returning to the car at 7.30 pm we could hear the waves crashing on the beach – the tide must have been in. I was glad to see on our drive back along the Front, with its rows of hotels, bed-and-breakfast establishments and restaurants, that the Beau Thai Restaurant is still open. I’ve never been in there, but a place with such a terrible name deserves to survive!

Remembrance Day

I looked out of a bedroom window this morning at dawn (about 7.00 am) and saw one of our local Barn Owls flying round the field behind the house. It perched for a while on a fence post but the photograph I took of it there never came out. However, I have included the following picture which I took at the same time, strange as it is, as a record of the owl’s presence.

Why this happened I have no idea! I was looking westward and it was fairly bright and cloudy. No pink anywhere! The sun hadn’t risen yet and would be on the other side of the house anyway.

At 11.00 am this morning I listened on the radio to Big Ben striking the hour and I kept the two minutes silence, praying for all those who have lost their lives in war and for those who have been damaged and injured by war and also for their loved ones. I am finding this more and more affecting as the years go by.

An Afternoon Walk

We have had so much rain recently that the garden and fields are sodden. R and I were in need of a little exercise and fresh air on Sunday afternoon so we decided to do our circuit walk round the lanes, which were less muddy and wet than the footpaths.

View from the lane across the field to All Saints church, just visible sticking out of the group of trees in the distance.

Our lane is fairly muddy as you can see!

There is a natural pond full of fish just to the right of these bollards. It is so full that it is close to overflowing onto the road.

Farmers round here cannot bear to get rid of old implements, tools and scrap metal. I think it gives them a sense of pride to survey this old stuff. ‘It may come in handy some day! It’s worth a lot of money, scrap metal is!’

St Nicholas church was demolished many hundreds of years ago. This is the site where it once stood – the cross is in a garden.

This is our nearest post-box. The lime-green lichen is happy to grow on it.

Just beyond the low pink barn in the distance is the largest tower of straw bales I have seen so far this year. Not a good picture I’m afraid – the light was already fading.

The goat on the left is keeping itself dry by lounging on a trampoline!

Water flowing fast in this ditch.

This is the other side of the bridge.

There is still a lot of green about. Many of the leaves have dropped from the trees while still green.

This is a field of oil-seed rape which is growing very well in our mild, wet autumn. Only a few weeks ago it seems, I was posting photographs of rolls of straw on these fields after the wheat harvest.

These are beautiful spindle berries. Only nature could make orange seeds emerge from shocking pink seed cases!

This is a spindle bush in the hedge. It was glowing in the light of the setting sun.

These are gorgeous dark-red haws from a hawthorn bush in the hedge.

Some leaves are beginning to show some colour.

These leaves caught my eye. I think this is a Sugar Maple – not a native tree.

Another view across the fields.

These are Guelder Rose leaves (Viburnum opulus)….

042Guelder rose with berry drupes (640x480)

…and this is another Guelder Rose with mainly green leaves and also bunches of berries or ‘drupes’.

A dead oak tree. I am pleased that landowners are not in as much of a hurry as they used to be to remove dead wood from fields and hedgerows. A dead tree supports more life than a living one.

These poisonous bryony berries are like shiny beads.

They are everywhere to be seen now the leaves are disappearing from the hedges.

The path through St Margaret’s churchyard is an attractive one….

…especially as one can see these sheep from there.

I thought the entrance to the car park outside the village hall was looking inviting.

I also liked this entrance to a field further along the lane.

A leafy puddle,

some tiny yellow toadstools…

and some more autumn shades and our walk was over.

An Update

06 Thu Nov 2014

Posted by Clare Pooley in cooking, Gardening, plants, Rural Diary, Uncategorized

≈ 20 Comments

Tags

anxiety, crop spraying, family, fero cactus, germination of crop, hospital, illness, pyracantha pruning, soup and smoothie maker, sugar beet harvest, unhappiness

Our ‘Fish-hook’ Fero cactus developed flower buds for the first time ever. It was so late in the season that the flowers never opened but we were pleased nevertheless.

I thought I would tell you a little of what has been going on with us.

This smoothie and soup maker is a new acquisition of my husband’s. He has been enjoying experimenting with different ingredients and then sampling the results.

My husband has an appointment with his specialist next Friday when we hope he will find out a little more about his condition. (He has a tumour on his pituitary gland which is probably benign).

‘The pituitary gland is a small ductless gland at the base of the brain which secretes hormones essential for growth and other bodily functions.’ The Concise Oxford Dictionary

He had a blood test yesterday in preparation for this appointment. My sister (who knows about these things as she works in the medical profession) tells us that to remove the tumour the surgeon will go up R’s nose as the gland is just behind where the eyebrows meet. It is often done during day surgery with no need to stay in hospital.

005Pyracantha at side of house (640x480)

I haven’t had much time for gardening lately but this pyracantha at the side of the house had grown so much since its last trim in May that I had to find the time to deal with it.

This is the result of two days of work with loppers and a step-ladder. I will have to get rid of the honeysuckle growing through the right-hand plant as it is pulling the whole thing away from the wall and I am frightened that high winds or heavy snow will cause the plant to lean too far forward and break.

Alice is still applying for jobs but with no luck so far. She has a part-time job at the university library filling shelves which doesn’t give her very much money and she is finding it very boring. She thinks she will finish writing her PhD in a couple of weeks time which will be wonderful as she has been at it for nearly four years. She may be able to spend more time looking for work when she doesn’t have to write so much. The drama group she belongs to has just performed ‘Antigone’ by Sophocles and Alice was in charge of the curtains and also performed other stage managerial duties. I didn’t go to see the play as I have too many calls on my time at home at the present. The next play is an adaptation of ‘Emma’ by Jane Austen and Alice has been cast as Emma. I would love to be able to go to see her in that but it may not be possible.

Most of the sugar beet has been harvested from the fields near us. This is very early in the season as usually, it is done during the wet and cold of late autumn and early winter and the lanes are then a sea of mud. So far we have had a fairly clean harvest.

My younger daughter E, has had a hard time adapting to college life. The first few weeks went very well but she suddenly had a return of her anxiety which really shocked her as she thought that she was in control of it. She has missed quite a few classes in all of the subjects she is taking as the panic attacks affected everything she did. There were days when she thought that she would be able to get into college and we would drive there only to find she was unable to get out of the car. The anxiety paralyses her and she cannot think logically. We would drive away and try again later. Some days we would make the journey three times. However, the staff at the college have been absolutely marvellous and have gone out of their way to help and encourage her. Last week was half-term and she was able to do a little catch-up work but spent most of the time feeling very depressed and frightened. This week however, she has suddenly found her feet again and has been in every day and is doing very well. We are praying, keeping our fingers crossed and touching wood. We have spoken to our GP who has enabled E and me to attend a four session course which will be every Monday evening for the next month on Stress Management which may give us a few helpful tips and stratagems. The course covers all sorts of stress, anxiety and depression so there will be some parts that will be of only partial relevance to E’s situation. However, with all the financial cuts to mental health we are lucky to get this help so we will take advantage of it. I am not sure when we will be able to cook and eat our evening meal as the course is between 6.00 pm and 7.30 pm and it will take about three-quarters of an hour to get there and the same to get home again. When R is at home he says that he will be able to help out.

This pre-germination spray of the field behind our house was performed on 4th October

My mother recovered slowly from her stomach upset and is now back to normal. I took her to Norfolk and Norwich Hospital on Tuesday for her regular eye check-up and she is fine and doesn’t need another injection yet.

You can see the horrible-looking green spray which smells very nasty

My mother-in-law collapsed about six weeks ago and lay on her bedroom floor for some time before she was discovered. She has a panic alarm which she wears around her neck but for some reason she didn’t press it. For some time she has had great difficulty in walking but after a rather strenuous visit to the hospital that day she found she couldn’t stand at all and fell down. She was taken to hospital the following day and it was discovered she had also had a mild heart attack. She is still in hospital as more and more problems with her health have been discovered. My husband has visited Manchester a couple of times for a few days to see her and help my brother-in-law out. It may be that R’s Mum won’t be able to go back home. She is still in the critical ward in the hospital until her health can be stabilised. She will then go into respite care for a month and will be assessed to see whether she could cope in her home or not. If she does go home she will have to have much more help than she had before. If it is found that she isn’t able to go home she will have to go into a nursing home and her house will have to be sold to pay for that. This is a very worrying time for R and his brother. Mum-in-law has her 89th birthday on Sunday.

This is the same field on the 15th October

The crop germinated quite quickly because of the warm and damp weather we had

At the same time as my poor mother-in-law was first in hospital my brother found that his 33-year marriage was at an end. He is absolutely shocked and very unhappy that all the effort he put into caring for his wife and their two children (who are now grown up) and making a nice home was all to no avail. His wife no longer wishes to be married to him as she has found someone else. They are now having to sell their house and everything they have has to be split between them – pensions, cars, furniture – everything. It is all proving to be too much for my brother to cope with. He has been to stay with me a couple of times so that he can see our mother and have a little comfort too. I have spoken to him tonight and he tells me that he has been signed off work for two weeks with depression and has been given anti-depressants by his doctor. He is looking for another job away from where he lives where he may be able to get a cheaper house or flat to live in. Both my sister and I have been through a divorce because our husbands no longer wanted to be with us so we know what he is going through. I am now happily married but my sister has not been able to find anyone else.

This is the field on the 31st October with a few pheasants.

So you see, life has not been a bed of roses for us for a while now. We hope that nothing else happens to add to our load of worries.

Hocus Pocus

04 Tue Nov 2014

Posted by Clare Pooley in Uncategorized

≈ 15 Comments

Tags

Halloween, Hocus Pocus

10384847_10100868591652438_202152085685042874_n

Alice’s Halloween!

I was so impressed by this photo my daughter posted on Facebook of her and two friends that I thought I would share it with you. I am assuming most of you have seen the film ‘Hocus Pocus’ and will agree with me that they have done a great job in looking so much like the three witches.

I have never celebrated Halloween – it was never something we did as children – but Alice has taken to it with enthusiasm and enjoys herself very much. Alice is in the blonde wig on the left.